Following Edge

Despite making steady progress on my overwhelming list of work, my continuing fatigue and depression keep me from enjoying much of my work. I haven't written much about work for over 2 weeks (or much of anything in the last week), and that's all about these (mostly) down feelings.

I agreed with Keith that he needed to take a week aside from the real exciting milestones-and-new-features work for his project to go back and re-work some of the "back end" server programming. Much of that programming was from very early in the project, before I was involved, so, of course, it wasn't as wonderful as the recent work, as I have been involved. (Truthfully, it has more to do with changes in the project than with my involvement, but that's not as impressive sounding.)

While I agreed that these changes were necessary to support deploying the project company-wide and necessary to support using the system in new applications (two of which are already in use), it's just not as exciting and rewarding to spend time improving something that has already been built. Despite the recent success of home remodeling shows on TV, I think people still find it more interesting to watch something new being built rather than watch remodeling.

On top of all that, I learned today that the department that's supposed to be testing the software stopped using it 4 weeks ago. This is really infuriating to me since we met with them 2 weeks ago with very good results and with no mention of the fact that they hadn't actually been using it! This seems to make the real possibility of getting the system ready soon for company-wide use absolutely impossible. It's disheartening. I have barely enough energy to do my own pile of overwhelming work and to also push/help Keith to make quick and effective progress on his programming. I don't think I can have the energy to push in the other direction to make people use it when they, evidently, don't want to.

Or, maybe, that's just my fatigue and depression talking. Hopefully, lab results and medication changes next week will lead to some remedy to the general "downs" in my mood. The remedy to the "downs" in my work may take something more.